


Talents Are a Social Construct, Smells Like Gender to Me

by XionChance



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magic, Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Alternate Universe - Urban Fantasy, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, F/F, Fluff, Humor, I have no idea what I'm doing, Magic, POV Lesbian Character, To share, Trans Female Fujisaki Chihiro, Useless Lesbians, and then it turned into a whole thing, i just thought this would be REALLY funny, seriously they're all lesbians with one braincell, talent swap
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:01:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25645471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/XionChance/pseuds/XionChance
Summary: Himiko tries a spell to share talent knowledge between people on Kaede and Chiaki, but ends up overdoing it and outright swapping literally everybody's talents... including her own. Whoops. Now, as the only three people who remember how it's supposed to be, Kaede, Himiko and Chiaki have to go find Chihiro Fujisaki, newly designated Ultimate Mage. Extremely gay hijinks ensue.
Relationships: Akamatsu Kaede & Nanami Chiaki, Akamatsu Kaede & Yumeno Himiko & Nanami Chiaki, Akamatsu Kaede/Yumeno Himiko, Nanami Chiaki & Yumeno Himiko
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	Talents Are a Social Construct, Smells Like Gender to Me

**Author's Note:**

> The story of this fic is that someone was talking about talent swaps and I went "What if it was literal, like a body swap? That sounds hilarious. I'm gonna make a oneshot of that." and then it became a whole damn thing lol. enjoy
> 
> DISCLAIMER: The Danganronpa franchise belongs to Spike Chunsoft. I do not stand to profit from this work in any way. Please support the original works.

Himiko Yumeno was unsure how she had managed to corral two of her fellow students into allowing her to test her magic on them, but somehow, she had managed it. In truth, Chiaki had been a bit sleepy when she agreed, Kaede was just that sweet of a person, and neither of them believed any of this was actually going to work, but Himiko would have probably considered that irrelevant anyway.

She was pacing the dorm room excitedly now, surveying the two girls. “Thank you for coming to help me with my studies…”

Chiaki tilted her head. “Is this really your studies…?”

Himiko giggled a little. “Not my _normal_ studies, silly. My **_magic_ **studies.” She said ‘magic’ like it was to be worshipped.

Kaede gave a bit of an awkward smile. “Well, what are you gonna be testing…?”

Himiko pulled out a massive spellbook--the thing was as wide as a coffee table book and as thick as a world history textbook. It was a wonder she could lift the damn thing. She flipped through it and stopped at page 617--which wasn’t even halfway in. It was covered in runes, symbols and diagrams that neither of the test subjects could understand.

At this point, Kaede started to understand just how serious this little chuuni actually was, and started to sweat.

Himiko grinned, making some final notes onto her own sheet of scratch paper. “If I’m correct, this spell will allow knowledge to be shared with a thought… shared talents, nyeeh…!”

Chiaki actually smiled a little at that. “That sounds nice… I think. Although… are you doing this because of your grades?”

Himiko sunk her head a little at that, actually looking miffed. “Magic at this level isn’t that trivial… this isn’t my usual spells.”

Kaede was really getting nervous now, and she glanced at the door… but no, _someone_ had to indulge the magician. “Are you… sure it’s safe?”

“Absolutely! Not."

Whatever. It was probably less dangerous than whatever the combat talent people got up to. Not like it’d actually work, right?

Himiko picked up her staff now, tapping it on the spellbook. “All right! Almost ready… just stand at attention, please…”

Kaede, of course, had an easier time standing straight than the still-sleepy Chiaki, but they both managed. When they seemed ready, Himiko began to spin her staff in the air, _which produced actual storm clouds._ Kaede’s eyes bulged at that. Chiaki just seemed a little pleasantly impressed.

Kaede started to entertain the idea that it was some smoke generator, but then Himiko started speaking in a language that resembled none she had ever heard. One that kind of made her head hurt if she focused on it too much… it felt _primordial_ and _ancient._ She gulped.

Finally, Himiko lifted her staff in the air. **“I cast… True Mind Switch…** **_at 9th level…!”_ **

Chiaki raised a finger. “I read that homebrew, isn’t it already at 9th lev--”

**_BANG._ **Everything spun around them, the world melting into a whirlpool of color, then fading to white. It was impossible to think in these conditions, like everything was being droned out and sucked into an endless void…

And then everything settled. Kaede found herself staring up at the ceiling--did all that make her faint? That was fair enough, honestly, but it was still concerning. And her head felt weird, like something had been shuffled around in there or something.

She sat up slowly. The dorm room looked pretty much the same as it did before it basically melted before her eyes… but what she noticed was her _clothes._ She had somehow ended up in a completely different outfit--her usual sweater vest had been traded for a white school outfit and a pastel pink hoodie. The hoodie had various pins on it--the Triforce, a Keyblade, a one-up mushroom--wait, how’d she know those off the top of her head? The only video games she ever played were Minecraft and Animal Crossing. She was innately aware of the pins in her hair, too, despite not seeing them--a game controller, D-pad arrows…

She looked around and caught sight of the other two students. Himiko’s outfit had changed as well--the magician’s outfit and hat had been replaced with just a simple green cardigan, along with what appeared to be some kind of weird high-tech green glasses. Chiaki’s outfit change was less drastic, but definitely noticeable upon inspection--the sea green of her hoodie swapped for a dark purple, her skirt traded for the same musical one Kaede had previously been wearing, musical note hair pins.

Chiaki pulled herself up, yawning. Sleepy even now. “Himiko… I think that must have been actually a sleep spell or something.”

Himiko rubbed her temples a little as she sat up as well. “ _Nyeh…_ wait…” She looked between Kaede and Chiaki, processing the new looks, then jumped up with excitement. _“Yes!_ My magic worked…! I told you…!”

Chiaki looked down at her outfit, then back at Himiko. “...Okay, maybe it was a costume change spell…”

Himiko shook her head. “Changed _talents,_ I told you that…!”

“Is that really possible…?”

Himiko nodded. She reached into the shelf under her TV and pulled out a Nintendo DS, sticking it in Kaede’s hands. “Try to beat Pokemon in 30 minutes.”

Kaede didn’t even hesitate in her response, though there was definite anime sweatdrop energy. “The world record for all the games on DS is, like, minimum three and a half hours.” _How did she know that?_

Himiko sighed. “Pokemon was the first game that came to mind that I had access to, okay? 

Kaede gave an awkward smile. “Fair enough...”

Himiko then turned to Chiaki, handing her… a mobile phone. “Listen, I didn’t actually… have the money for an entire grand piano. So… you’ll have to use a game I found on the app store, nyeh…”

Chiaki took the phone and looked at the app. “...Isn’t this that tile game they’re always advertising on Youtube…?”

“I don’t have a budget.”

Chiaki shrugged and opened the game up. Kaede opened up her own game as well… and as the chiptune of the game’s intro kicked in, everything suddenly rushed into her mind at once. _Everything_ about the game came to her--the stats, the optimal strategies and routes, probabilities galore, every little crack the developers had forgotten to patch. It was like she had been obsessively studying this game all her life--nay, almost like seeing it as if she had developed it herself.

She _could_ complete Pokemon in 30 minutes-- _she could do it in fucking five._ Just… not the fun way to play the game, but since it was requested…

She looked up at Himiko. “Glitches allowed?”

Himiko’s eyes lit up like a child who had just been handed an entire bag of candy. “Oh, _please_ use glitches, nyeh…!”

Kaede blinked, then did a small, awkward laugh. “What I have planned isn’t that exciting…!”

Himiko waved her hand dismissively. “All glitches are exciting, Akamatsu…!”

Kaede bit her lip. She had a suspicion of what was going on, but she didn’t want to press the issue just yet. This would all… work out, probably! Yeah.

...Besides, Himiko was _really fucking cute_ when she was that excited--Pokemon! Professor Oak!

Within three minutes--most of which was spent just talking to people, this wasn’t a speedrun-friendly game even for an Ultimate--Kaede was out of the starting town and taking advantage of a walk-through-walls glitch to basically just walk to the ending. Really, it was quite boring--a whole lot of holding Up on the D-pad. But Himiko was watching intently, absolutely in awe.

Kaede looked up at her. "You're really that excited about me walking through a wall?"

Himiko smiled. "That's what you see on the screen… it's what's going on in the code that's the real show...!"

"I mean, you can't actually see the code…"

Himiko grinned, pointing to her glasses. There were streams and streams of text going across the lenses, some of it highlighted in various colors. "Actually, I can, nyeh…!"

Kaede blinked. "Where did you get that?"

"I just modified some smart glasses, it was really quite simple. Had to add a wireless receiver that was compatible with the devices I wanted, but other than that, it's all just software hacking…!"

Kaede paused, thinking about how to approach this. Again, she _was_ cute this way, but Kaede was concerned about something. "...Himiko, do you notice anything… weird about yourself?"

Himiko tilted her head. "I'm not sure what you mean?"

"Like… I don't think you've ever been into computer stuff at all."

"What are you talking about? Did you forget that I'm the Ultimate Program--" Himiko froze for a beat. And then she blushed and put her hands together with embarrassment. "...Nyeh… I guess I put a little more power into that spell than I meant to…"

Kaede made a small, awkward laugh, closing the DS as she completed her run. "Maybe a little… I hope Chihiro is okay…!"

Himiko shrugged. "Ah, I'm sure she's fine… test is almost done anyway! Speaking of which…" She looked to Chiaki. "How is it coming along?"

Chiaki had her eyes closed. After a moment, she jumped, then yawned. "Poorly… I cannot understate how tiny this piano is…"

Kaede blinked as a thought came to her mind. "...Shouldn't you still at least be good at video games?"

"Probably," Chiaki said. "It's actually a bit frustrating…"

Kaede looked up at Himiko. "I think we swapped talents… like, _swapped_ them. Actually lost our old talents to make room for the new one."

Himiko sighed. "Nyeh… definitely put too much power into the spell… let me reverse it…"

Kaede gulped. "...Himiko… you got talent swapped too. You're a programmer now."

"Oh, don't worry! Magic can't be just stolen like that, nyeh…"

She went to the spellbook and stared at the page blankly for a second.

"...Oh."


End file.
